From as far back as my junior high school, I remember struggling to find happiness. I felt like I didn’t fit in and lost confidence in myself.  School was difficult and friendships evaded me. I wondered if I would ever be happy.  My high school years continued to be a challenge and I was looking for happiness in all the wrong places.   My Mom tried everything, even sending me to Wilderness camps to help me find my footing. Eventually, I went to a private therapeutic school for my senior year.  Unfortunately, my life continued to be shrouded in darkness.

Do you remember the day Jesus became real to you?

When I hear the lyrics to "When You Walk Into The Room" play anywhere, my mind immediately goes back to Camp Jackson's sanctuary. This church camp holds a great deal of significance in my life with Jesus.

When my mind wanders back in time, I reflect on the sweet moment I had there where God met me in my lowest place and called me worthy. Even now, my words can't express how His nearness made me feel. From that day forward, I knew without a doubt that God was real!

It is well with my soul . . . Really?

I’ve heard these words many times. Something about them stands out to me, but can I say it is well with my soul and really believe it is? Loving God is one thing, but living with Him fully enthroned can be difficult sometimes because it's not about me anymore.

It’s hard. I desire. I fear. I feel. 

A few years ago, I began to develop seasonal allergies. It got so bad my vocal chords were actually damaged. For a time my voice hurt all day, every day. As a worship leader,  it was very sad for me because I could barely sing. Yet singing worship songs is my favorite thing to do!