THIS SHOULD NEVER HAPPEN TO ANYONE ON OUTREACH

We zigzagged up the dirt roads into the mountain jungles of Thailand to visit a small children's school for our Discipleship Training School outreach. Our team had prepared well, but not for what was about to happen to me.
I was the designated Devil in our skit. I'm not sure why I'm always chosen to play the Devil. Still, even in my School of Evangelism some 10 years later, I was cast as the Devil yet again in the infamous musical skit called "Clincher." Hopefully, my role as a sinister villain has nothing to do with personal appearance! Yikes!

The team assembled all of the young Thai school children dressed in their cute little matching uniforms into tight cornrows on the ground outside the main school building. The setup was pretty simple. The story was simpler yet.

The leading man in our skit is an unsuspecting young person just trying to make their way through life. My team member was doing a tremendous job in capturing the attention of the school kids.

The music alters from a serene elevator arrangement into something a bit darker and sinister-sounding⏤a heavy metal band with crashing electric guitars vibrated through the air and had the little students nearly sitting on top of each other.

Now I have to interject here. First, you must remember we are foreigners. We are already attention-grabbing as it is, with our fair white skin glistening in the 120-degree sunshine. Add in the dramatizing of Satan tempting a human being…well, let's just say…no one wasn't watching!

As the tempter, I was growling at the students as if I were a 300lb WWF fighter in the main event in Las Vegas. My poor teammate almost didn't know what to think of my antics, but he was hanging in there. I tempted him with a variety pack of smoking cigarettes and joints mixed with a bit of lust and anger.

With all this growling and carrying on with full theatrics, I started to feel a little thirsty. The music was playing, and the next tempting moment in full drunkenness was about to happen.

I didn't realize how important having a small drink of water beforehand would have benefitted me. I've drunken out of a bottle, I guess since infancy, off and on. However, this particular time, when I threw my head back to down the insatiable fake drink I was pantomiming, I let out a huge gasp of satisfaction. To my horror, the biggest snot ball loogie came flying out of my mouth a good 10 feet into the air.

This was not the climax of the drama, but it was for the school kids. Their eyes were the size of china saucers thinking Freddie Krueger of Elm Street fame was now stepping out of the jungle. My life was in slow motion as I saw this incredibly large loogie fly end over end, heading straight for the middle of the children.

Ever seen a drop of soap fall into water and oil? That's just what happened. Those kids moved like Hussain Bolt! Imagine this tall white foreign man spitting a snot ball the size of a huge marble at you! There's only one thing to do. Get out of the way! Thank God they did.

Incredibly, my drama partner didn't miss a beat of the story, and without hesitancy, he "beat me up" right there in front of those kids. He wasn't giving in to Satan's temptation, and he surely was not okay with me hocking a loogie at our would-be young converts.

I was so glad when that drama was over. The only bad part was that we had to stick around and talk to the kids. I never said a word about my fiasco. I guess in the end, they didn't mind at all.

This article was runner up in our recent "Wild Outreach Stories Contest." Hope you enjoyed it! 

Outreach stories are filled with laughter and miracles. The next 5 months of your life could be spent making incredible memories. Look into when the next discipleship school starts.